Open Community Potluck Sunnyvale

THIS EVENT IS CROSS POSTED ON OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA/EVENT PAGES. EXPECTED ATTENDANCE OF AROUND 30 PEOPLE

Welcome to the Open Hearted Community!

Events organizer: Rose Zeitler

MC: Gem

You're invited to a potluck social for people who are currently practicing or are curious about non-monogamy. Experience with non-monogamy is not required to attend.

We welcome:

-Straight, Gay, and all identities and orientations within the LGBTQ+ rainbow

-Solo Poly, Relationship Anarchist, Polyamory, Swingers, Monogamous but dating someone Non-Monogamous

-Friend/Ally of someone Non-Monogamous

-And all the other lovely flavors of Non-Monogamy

This community values consent, honesty, authenticity, vulnerability, kindness, and accountability. We invite you into our safe space and hope that you feel welcome and at home here

RSVP / INVITING GUESTS

The event will fill up. RSVP sooner than later.

Please RSVP here on Bloom. If you do want to create a Bloom account or you want to invite a guest that does not have a Bloom account, check if tickets are available on the Eventbrite page for this event.

Eventbrite page HERE

Please do not RSVP twice for the same person.

LOCATION

Brad’s Home in Sunnyvale

ACCESSIBILITY

Stairs inside to reach the second floor social space

PETS

No PETS live at this location. Service animals allowed, let us know in the chat if you’re bringing a service animal.

WHEN ARE THINGS HAPPENING? 

Show up between 6:30 - 7PM, earlier is recommended if this is your first potluck

6:30pm - 7:15pm: Socializing and Potluck Dinner

7:15pm - 7:30pm: Opening Circle, Topic, Rules

7:30pm - 8:30pm: Small group discussion time - Break into small groups and share our thoughts and experiences on the topic, or choose your own topic

8:30pm - 8:45pm: Once that is finished we’ll gather back into a large group and people will have the opportunity to share things they learned with the entire group

8:45pm - 9:30pm: More socializing and catching up with each other

DISCUSSION TOPIC

Not yet decided, taking suggestions during opening circle.

Any topic related to non monogamy, communication, relations, dating, etc.

POTLUCK FOOD

This is a dinnertime potluck event, so bring food to share. Potluck sign up CLICK HERE

Your potluck contribution can be home cooked or take out. Many different options are much preferred to 5 different types of chips and dip, so please check the potluck sign up before grabbing your food.

If you want a challenge, there are usually people attending who would appreciate Gluten Free, Vegan, Vegetarian, or Low Sugar foods.

PARKING

Street parking: around Muwékma Park

https://maps.app.goo.gl/QthjsJptmGWbhTji6

Then cross the street to arrive at Brad’s place

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COMMUNITY GUIDELINES

Please read all of the guidelines if you are new (or if it has been a while since you attended)

CONFIDENTIALITY

Everything shared in this group should be treated as confidential and private

Do not greet people outside of this group in a manner that would out them.

COMMUNITY AND LIFESTYLE OVERLAP: Strive to be Aware and Considerate in conversation

There’s lots of different communities overlapping at this gathering. Some are spicy, some are vanilla, some are both.

Keep in mind that topics and activities that you are a HELL YES to talking and hearing about may not be a HELL YES to other people sharing the space with you.

For example: Not everyone who is non monogamous is a voyeur, whether it with eyes or ears. Graphic stories of sexual or kink scenes may be wanted by some, but not by everyone. Read the room and keep details light unless you know that everyone within the immediate hearing area is a HELL YES to hearing it. If it's a HELL YES by all, have fun sharing! If you’re not sure, ASK, or keep it light.

We encourage everyone to advocate for themselves if a conversation comes up that makes them uncomfortable. For example, say: "I'm not comfortable with this topic, can we please talk about something else?" Or can relocate to a different group.

CONSENT AND RESPECTING BOUNDARIES

At this event you may see hugging, kissing, and cuddling. Do not assume that what someone does with other people will be comfortable for them to do with you.

Always ask for consent when entering someone’s personal space. For example, asking someone, “Would you like a hug”? Or “OK if i sit next to you on the couch?”

If you are asked, we encourage you to take a moment and check in with yourself before responding honestly. If you are a YES, great!

If you are a NO, great! You can say “no thank you”, or if you want to connect but not in the way they asked, you can say, “I don’t want that but I am open to "_______” (something else). For example “I’m a NO to a hug, but yes to a high five”

If someone says no to your request, the easiest response you can give is : ” thank you for taking care of yourself “ and moving on

HOLDING SPACE FOR EACH OTHER

If you feel comfortable doing so, hold space for each other. Holding space means letting others speak their truth, without assumptions, judgement, or trying to fix them. Sometimes this is the only place where someone can have space held for them to simply be and express what they are experiencing.

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SAFER SPACE GUIDELINES

We strive to provide a “safer space” for community members. What do we mean by “safer space”?

In short, a “safer space” is a place where behavioral guidelines support each of us in guarding each person’s self-respect and dignity, a place for open and honest communication, where one has the freedom to speak or not to speak, where one takes responsibility for recognizing one’s own triggers as well as how (and when) other people are triggered, where confidentiality, empathy, and compassion are encouraged and difference is accepted.

Our “safer space” guidelines CANNOT AND DO NOT guarantee your safety, nor do they guarantee that you will always feel safe.

Each of us is responsible for setting and communicating clear boundaries when engaging with people at events. All attendees must respect the physical and personal boundaries of other attendees at all times.

Keep in mind that you can make someone uncomfortable without intending to do so. Comments that may seem innocuous to you can be painful to others. Light touch, hugging, cuddling, and other seemingly innocent forms of physical contact can be offensive or alarming when such touch is given without explicit permission.

Pro-Tip for new attendees: Circulate at events. Be graceful. If you’re enjoying talking to someone, give him or her the opportunity to exit the conversation anyway.

We do not tolerate harassment of any kind. If you harass someone, you will be asked to leave and may be banned from future events. Harassment includes (but is not limited to) making unwelcome sexual advances; making comparative comments about age, race, religion, nationality, sexual expression, gender expression, sexual orientation, weight, or lifestyle; touching, photographing, or recording people without their explicit permission; demanding contact information from others; deliberate intimidation; mockery; stalking; following; and sustained disruption of events.

We believe that most people who attend our events do so without ill intentions. However, if you experience or witness inappropriate behavior, please bring it to the attention of the organizer, host, or a person at the event that you feel safe with.